Black Hearts
by OneroikaLunae
Summary: Alexandra posses as a man to keep herself safe in Nassau until her family has the money to go to the States and live like proper hones citiziens. Alex's life changes when Captain Vane crosses her path. Will it be for the best or for the worst? Follow their story in this work.
1. Life in Nassau

Life in Nassau was dangerous. Everything was out to get you. The pirates, the navy, the fucking island itself. Life was dangerous for the men that lived in that island, that sailed those waters. If you were unlucky enough to be born with a pair of tits, then, life had fucked you up for the very beginning.

Women in the Caribbean had few choices. If you were legal, and respectable, you marry a man with a legal way to earn his living, and you would give him children and be a faithful wife the rest of your life attending church on Sundays while you're husband got himself lowly drunk on the pub or the whorehouse. Then, life had other choice for women, you could became a whore, and make money selling yourself to men who would abuse you and use you every day of your life until you became too old for them to have any interest on your body.

Few, very few, went for the third option. You grew up some balls, learn how to fight, renounce to skirts and dresses and feminine things, and join a pirate crew. It will give you freedom as nothing else would on these waters. But it was a risky thing to.

No matter what choice you make. In the end, men would come that would take away all you held dear, that would rape you, and beat you and kill you and your own. But you have the choice to let life fucked you up good without a fight, or get that fucker back with tooth and nails and everything you've got.

Alex was trying her best to do something between been legal and pass as a man. Her father learned his lesson when the Pirates went deep into the island, back when the bay was not protected by the men in the fort, and killed Alex's mother. Alexandra herself and her brothers saved their lives because their mother stuffed them of the tiny hole under the planks of the floor in their house. She had moved the table over the secret door and braced herself for what may come. The hole would fit the skinny children and their valuables, but not the grown woman. She had died screaming in the floor, surrounded by pirates. Emmet Randall, Alex's father, decided that if his daughter had to live in such a dangerous place she should learn how to protect herself. At first it had been a mere change of clothes. Of name. Alexandra became Alex, and soon even Sam and Joe forgot she was their sister. Later, children's games taught her how to punch. Her brothers taught her how to spit; she worked with her father on the docks. And at the docks, knowing how to use knife, pistol and sword was essential to survive. She learned how to tolerate alcohol when her father and his friends started to take her to the inn for a drink or two after work. And so, she became a man in the eyes of the world.

Alexandra Randall had a few rules that she lived by. Never anger the pirates, Never spent more money that you got on your pocket, and never mess up at work. She had a few alternatives, depending on the occasion, but mainly, those three kept her out of trouble. Since she accepted that job as peacekeeper on Miss Eleanor's inn a couple of months ago, though, it seems she would be unable to follow number one every night. Especially with the crew form the Ranger in town. Those men were animals, led by one even more brutish than the rest. Charles Vane wasn't a gentleman, not even a human being. When Miss Eleanor wasn't close, sometimes even when she was, and Charles Vane walked into the inn, someone ended up bleeding.

Since Miss Eleanor and Captain Vane split up ( She ditched him, it was said, and knowing Miss Eleanor, It would be very possible) Vane had been keeping himself on check, as if avoiding staining the floor with blood would put him on Miss Eleanor's good side again. And Miss Eleanor has noticed, Oh, she noticed, and that was exactly the reason why Alex was hiding in the shadows of the pub, as usual, but, instead of watching out for troublemakers, she was supposed to keep her eyes glued to captain Vane all night. Or all the time he was on the inn.

Vane new he was being watched. He knew. Every couple of minutes or so he would take a sip from his drink, squeeze the girl on his lap and look straight into Alex's eyes at the other side of the pub. Alex new that she would have to act if the captain and the girl starting acting too indecently, that was Miss Eleanor's inn, for other things, the brothel was just across the street.

Sip. Squeeze. Stare. Sip. Squeeze. Stare. Repeat. Again. Again and again. Fucking guy was getting on her nerves. But Alex couldn't let it show. She was been paid by Miss Eleanor to keep things right on the inn, and now, to keep an eye on Charles Vane. Who was moving from his table to the bar, for another drink, she thought, only, he didn't return. He stayed there, out of her sight. Crap. She had to follow Miss Eleanor's orders; she was supposed to do her job. She shifted, to no avail. From this position she didn't see a fucking thing that went on at the bar. She sighed. She had made numbers. A few years in the docks and the inn, maybe some less dangerous works, here and there, and her family would have enough to get the fuck out of this hell on earth. It was freedom, but it was death and madness too. She made her way to the bar and made a sign to the girl behind the counter. She knew she could only serve them water while they were working, but Alex needed to fake it or Vane would be even more suspicious than he already was. Miss Eleanor could have chosen another for this, she thought. Someone who could actually take down Vane if trouble aroused. Alex following him around would bring only trouble damn it, but it wasn't like she could say no to Eleanor. It was a good thing those bandages around her tits were so fucking tight. They had grown bigger that last summer, and now she had to wear tighter bandages and loose clothes to hide them. Eleanor though her a young boy, Alex boy, eager for a job and a fight. No use fighting when you could breathe only half the air the other guy was breathing.

She took a sip while looking at Vane from the corner of her eyes. The man finished his drink, tossed a coin to the barmaid and then proceed to go straight to FUCK, Miss Eleanor's receiving room, at the end of the stairs. She knew Miss Eleanor didn't invite him there. Alex left the glass on the table and went after him, skipping the steps two at a time in her haste to reach Vane. Until, at the top of the stairs, just when she was looking left and right for the man, a hand came from nowhere (or at least she thought it was nowhere) and grabbed her hair just to throw her against the wall. Fuck. Vane. His eyes were burning holes into her soul. Those fucking blue eyes. The fist on her hair slammed her skull again into the wall before releasing her.

"What the fuck are you doing boy?" Alex tried, and failed to conceal her voice "Following orders from Miss Eleanor" She knew that Miss's name would stop him from killing her. She hoped. "Were you? Oh, In that case…" Vane punched her in the face, and her skull bounced on the wall before she doubled over. Her breathing wasn't very regular. The adrenaline and the bindings were keeping her from doing it properly. Fight back damn it. Fight. She wouldn't let this brute beat her. She was better than that. She dodged the next punch. Delivered a couple of them herself at the end of Vane's ribs, where she knew it would cut his breathing. He tried to go for her neck but she threw herself to the left, against the wall, and it was too late by the time she realized she had trapped herself on a corner. Panicking, she did the only thing she could think of. She kicked him on the balls, and use those precious seconds were he's mind was clouded with pain to punch him straight in the neck. He fell to his knees, scratching at his throat and looking at her with those bewitching eyes opened widely with surprise. She tried to pass by his side but his hands closed like iron around her ankles, making her fall face first. She kicked wildly, until a kick in his skull freed her from him.

Alex drew her sword and put it under his chin. She was panting and hurting all over. "If I kill you, Miss Eleanor would be mad at me" she put more pressure on her blade, forcing his chin up. He looked at her with those eyes, and she saw her death on their bottomless depths. She was scared, so, so scared. Of all the pirates she could have fought, she never imagined she would end up holding a cutlass against Charles Vane's neck. She was going to end up dead. And raped, if they discovered her before they cut her throat. Nay, probably fucking animal would beat her to a bloody pulp with his own fists.

Vane smirked and she realized she was trembling. "You are just a boy, bloody lucky boy, stop playing with sharp things, or you will end up cutting yourself" Alex was two heartbeats away from screaming for Miss Eleanor to come and call this beast off. "I…I have orders from Miss Eleanor" Vane took her blade in his hands and pushed away. She resisted, but stopped the very moment she saw the blood on his palm. Vane brushed the blade away and kept staring at her. He rose from the floor, and Alex realized that, compared to her five foot and a half, he was a bloody giant. "You have guts, boy, but, cross me again, and I would beat you to death" Alex straightened and fury took over. She was just doing her job! The bloody bastard could have some compassion for a lass, well, lad, lass, for her! She had to obey Missus orders or get kicked out and be on the streets. "I work for Miss Eleanor" She said, dripping venom in every word "She said to keep an eye on you as long as you were on her propriety, and that's exactly what I was doing. You can't blame a lad for earning a living honestly, Captain or not, and you most certainly don't have Miss Eleanor's permission to go to the upper rooms, so it was my job to make you go back to the bar downstairs" She didn't realized she had her fists balled resting on her hips or how much like her mother she looked in that moment. She would have been worried for what the pirate might do to her, if said pirate wasn't laughing his ass off at her.

She stared dumb folded at Captain Charles Vane, feared among the feared of Nassau, while he laughed, his hands on his belly trying to stop himself, tears on his eyes, nearly doubled over. "Do you think is funny? To nearly cost a fellow the way he puts food on the table?" She still had her work on the docks, but been a guard for the inn was more profitable by far. Vane was sobering up a bit, at least he could stand up straight, even if his shoulders were shaking badly. "How angry you are, boy. What a mighty impression of your mother have you done! How old are you? Fourteen? What was Eleanor thinking?" He lighted again "you are full of fire, aren't you? A couple of years more and I wouldn't mind adding you to my crew!" She was a little hurt, She was a grown woman of eighteen, many a girl of her age already had whelped two or three kids. But better for her that he thought she was a little boy, than he figured out she was a woman. Woman didn't fare well on the Caribbean, not when trapped on a corner with a dangerous, drunken pirate. "Please go back to the inn sir, go back downstairs, so I don't get in trouble with Missus" He wasn't smiling anymore "I have business with Eleanor"

"You can't be here sir, please go away" Alex was going to get into trouble. She knew were Miss Eleanor was. She was across the street, with Max, the french whore. Vane would get angry. But, then again, if he crossed the street it would be the whorehouse problem, not hers. Anyway, if the pirate got angry he may just beat her black and blue before going for Missus. Alex wouldn't be a very good bodyguard if she led him to the one she was supposed to protect. " I don't give a fuck about it, fetch Eleanor, NOW" He looked savage. But he was drunk. She had a chance. Anyway she had to escape this situation. The cutlass was still on her hands, he never bother taking it from her. But. Missus would definitely fire her if she stabbed Vane. Not to mention that Vane's crew of animals would be hot on her trail when word went around. She sheathed her blade and held her hands in front of her.

"Captain Vane, She's not here, you should try to find her later, If you would just go down stairs…" his big callous hand came to twist itself on her shirt and he lifted her from the floor "I'm gonna enter that office, and you aren't telling me what to do, boy" Then he dropped her, and she fell flat on her bum. The brute. The drunken brute. That bastard son of a rotten clam. She was there on the floor looking at him walking to the door of the office. Suddenly a white hot rage burn through her and before she realized it, she had jumped to her feet, grabbed a vase and broken it on the Captain's head. Finally, the alcohol and the blow brought Vane to his knees. She stared to her hands, at Vane unconscious form, at her hands again, and Vane. Crap. Crap. CRAP. DID SHE JUST HIT CHARLES FUCKING VANE ON THE HEAD WITH A BLOODY VASE? SHE WAS SO DEAD. Think. Think. Don't panic. Okay, maybe panic a little, a lot. Oh Fuck. Vane was going to gut her. She opened the doors of Miss Eleanor's office and dragged Vane into it. Closing the doors, she combed her hair with her fingers. So Dead. Nah. She was no one. He wouldn't remember in the morning. She only had to put him on somewhere comfortable and wait for Missus to return. Explain the situation and then, make herself scarce for couple of days, maybe weeks, so Vane would forget her face, That, if he had looked at her in the face enough time to remember it. She was unimportant enough that Vane wouldn't bother to remember her face. She dragged him to the corner where the sofa stood. Problem. HE WAS SO FUCKING HEAVY. No way she could put him on the sofa on her own. She laid him on his back on the floor and put some pillows under his head. And that was it. She only had to wait until Missus came back from across the street. She sat by Vane's side, holding one of the heavies chandeliers, just in case.

Time passed. Alex grew impatient and started pacing. More time passed. Fuck. How long was the boss lady going to be with the french whore? Step after step, to the end of the room and back again. More time passed. Alex realized that the sounds from downstairs weren't as loud as before, and she stopped pacing, sitting beside Vane's head, she passed the time looking into the man's face. The man was good looking when he wasn't trying to strangle you. Interesting nose, interesting cheeks. Very kissable lips. The shirt was open all the way down to his waist. All right. The man had a freaking gorgeous body. Those Abs. Very, very, edible. Nooope. Not thinking about that. Not at all. She couldn't risk it. She would have to wait until she made it out of that place and found a respectable man for herself. That didn't meant she was made of fucking stone. Well, that certainly meant that, even if she couldn't touch him… she could watch.

Even in the shadowed room, he was handsome. A very fine specimen of human male. Strong and savage. Unconscious and drunk. Very, very drunk. And bleeding from a cut on his forehead. It had stopped bleeding a while ago, but the blood had dried on his skin and it looked really bad. The kick she had given him before wasn't that bad, but it was slightly red and swollen. Alex stood up and searched for something to clean his face with. She found a jar of water and a cup, and took it back to Vane. He was still unconscious on the floor. Alex removed her hat and the scarf she wore around her head. Carefully, she dipped it on the water and started washing away the dirt and the blood. "I'm sorry, please don't kill me" She didn't knew why she was even speaking to him, he wasn't listening, anyway, though she thought, she wouldn't speak to him at all if he had been awake. "But really, you made my work difficult on purpose. You knew that I was watching you; you knew Miss Eleanor was my employer. Did you listen? No, you didn't, and of course, you had to beat the crap out of me. I could have run you through with my blade, you know? I mean, your crew would have killed me in some horrible, imaginative, painful way came morning, but I would have been the lass that killed fucking Captain Charles Vane" She finished with him and washed her face for good measure, knowing that her eye would be black, even if it wasn't swelling, and her nose bled for a while, just the same as her split lip.

"Fucking brute, you did a number of my face" she put on her hat " I hope miss Eleanor chews your balls off for this" Just in that moment, Eleanor Guthrie crossed the door and fixed her eyes upon them. Alex jumped to her feet.

"Miss Guthrie! He was acting very calm all night, booze and girls, but he seemed to notice me and then he came upstairs. I tried to stop him, he demanded to see you and I might have hit him a bit too hard on the head" She was babbling. Fuck. Miss Guthrie always looked like she has been sucking lemons. How someone who just got laid could have such an expression? Eleanor Guthrie looked upon her ex lover and back to Alex. "Ask one of the men to come and help you get him to his tent" Alex swallowed; she didn't want to be with Vane more that it was necessary. "Miss Eleanor, Am I in trouble?" Eleanor Guthrie looked at her with her cold calculating eyes. "You will be if you disobey me, go" She went downstairs and called Jack to help her. Between the two of them dragged the unconscious pirate back to his camp. About half way there, Alex was already cursing and struggling. She had been carrying barrels around since she was thirteen, she could bare the weight. But, such a big man, there was no way she could get a proper hold, not with jack, who was much taller than her, on the other side of the pirate.

"Vane sure is built like a fucking bull" said Jack, and Alex grunts as an answer. The tents where Vane's crew spent shore time were just at the end of the street. Just a few more meters. JUST. A. FEW. Oh god. She was going to be so sore in the morning, and she had to get home yet. And there was work on the morning now that most of the pirates came back from their hunting trips… She groaned again, and Jack chuckled. "Came on Alex, we will find one of his men and he will be their problem" But, Oh just her luck. All the men must have gone to town. None was left on the camp. Alex wanted to cry. She was tired, Vane had fucking beat her and it bloody hurt, and now this. Patience, she needed more patience. "Fuck our luck" said Jack, and damn it all, she agreed. "This way, I know which one is his, I have been here with Missus before" They dragged him the rest of the way to the tent, opened it and put him in to what seemed the bed. They both were panting and sweating. And just in that moment, she could swear she had seen that bastard Vane smile faintly, but she couldn't be sure with the poor light of the tent. Bastard. Yes, make her drag him all the way back to his bed, who would have thought that bloodthirsty Charles Vane was a fucking five year old? Jack was already out of the tent waiting for her. She glared at Vane. Got close enough to him and whispered "I hope I hit you that hard, asshole, because if not you are a childish son of a bitch" She hit him again on the arm with her fist and run away.

She left Jack behind and kept walking fast through town until she reached the house she shared with her brothers and her father. Everything was dark, and her brothers were already asleep. Her father, though, was smoking a cigarette, in the dinner table, and smile upon her arrival. "I was starting to worry, everything all right at work?" Alex didn't know if telling him, but her father had always been a wise man. "I got into a fight with Charles Vane while following Miss Eleanor's orders but I'm afraid the bastard may have feigned being unconscious so we had to carry him back to his bed and so, I punched him again before leaving his camp and now I'm afraid He's going to kill me even if I really hope he was really really drunk so the hangover finishes him off and I can live another day" Her father rose with a worried expression and hug her. Uugggh, it hurt. "Try to stay out of his sight from now on, please Alexandra, and no more fights in a while" She hugged him back " yes dad, I love you, I'm going to sleep now" "Goodnight sweetheart" Alex changed her clothes and undid the bandages around her chest. Man, It was wonderful to been able to breath so deeply. She feel into her bed and was sleep in no time. Her dreams were full of strong, long haired pirates with piercing blue eyes and a wicked smile.


	2. Gentle rough hands

Alex awoke suddenly, with the ghost of the dream still clinging to her, she was able to feel the warmth of his skin and see the blue of his eyes, and feeling horny all over. Fuck.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Just her luck. Couldn't she had the hots for someone a little safer than one of the most feared fucking pirates of the fucking island nooo of course, it was just her fucked up taste. It will pass. It was just the fact that she was unable to get laid without outing herself as a girl, coupled to the fact that most of those pirates had hard bodies with big muscles and tanned skin and how in hell were they so devilishly handsome? It will pass. Just like it happened when Billy Bones arrived and turned her into a mosh brained pile of teenage goo. She had recovered, took care of herself, and carried on with her life. She rose to wash herself a little and start her day. Once she was disguised like a boy she went to the kitchen where her brothers and her dad were already having breakfast.

She poured some milk, even if she wasn't sure if this was the milk she had bought yesterday morning or if one of her sibs went to get more. She sniffed it. Seemed fresh. If she had to run later back home because she was sick, she was going to kill them. With the mug in her hand she sat at the table. One of her brothers, Joe, looked at her and whistled. "Heard from Da, Vane got you good yesterday, didn't knew you could got a _green_ eye in a tavern fight sis" Her father knocked his head "Shut up jerk, Vane could have wringed my neck or worse, I'm lucky he was so wasted" "Alex, darling, just stay out of his sight a couple of days, yes?"

She smiled "Sure dad, I don't want to end up floating on the bay" She wouldn't mind doing other things with Vane, anyway, she wouldn't mind doing things with some other pirates too, so ENOUGH of this new found obsession for the man who was in total, pathetic absolute love with her lady boss. She was totally convinced it was because Vane was the most recent man she had seen showing a decent amount of skin. Even wearing that fucking shirt, Vane didn't bother to button it up. The man had no decency and was oblivious to the effect he caused.

"you are too silent sis" said his other brother, Sam, from her left side "usually we are trying to shut you up this early in the morning" she shrugged, and one of the punches Vane gave her hurt, she made a face "I don't want to talk this morning, everything seems to be sore". Her family seemed to eat up the half lie, but Alex wasn't about telling them that her inner panicking was caused by her newly found sexual attraction to Charles Vane. Even now that she was a woman grown, they still treated her like she was a wee babe. A sigh escaped her lips. The curse of being the youngest child was never to be taken seriously by the family. That included any kind of attraction towards other people.

They ate their breakfast with the constant sounds of Joe and Sam chatting about things that happened yesterday night, about the girls they were courting, and their father often interrupted them to offer his counsel. When they finished, they cleaned up and headed to the docks, where they work unloading cargos and moving them from one storehouse to the other.

Alex had been working under the scorching sun all morning, and they were just about to finish their shift. All the members of her family were equally tired and sweaty. Her sibs had taken off their shirts, and use their scarfs to cover their heads and faces, so they wouldn't get burnt in the sun. She couldn't do the same, thought, and only dared to undo some buttons, her fight of the other night the perfect excuse for her bandages. "Bloody bastard got me good" was the only thing she said when asked. She couldn't find her scarf anywhere that morning, and so she had to bear the hat, which offered protection from the sunrays, but was cooking her head in exchange.

"Alex, come on son, they have allowed us a rest and a drink before we go move the last of the barrels for today" Her father's hand on her shoulder shakes her off from her thoughts. Copping with the heat and the heavy work was easier for her if she imagined what kind of life she would lead once they were out of Nassau.

She walk by her father and joined her brothers, who were drinking water that had been left on the shade. She swallowed two mugs and was in the middle of the third when a scared boy tugged on her sleeve to get her attention. "Miss Eleanor wants a word with you" Oh great. Surely she was going to be fired. Damn it. You are not in trouble, her ass. She sighed. "I will go to the tavern as soon as I can, I'm sure Miss Eleanor will understand" If she was about to be fired from one job, she didn't want to risk the other. The boy made a face. "She… she sent someone to talk to you, He's waiting for you around the corner" That. That rung all her alarm bells.

A trap. Not even an elaborated one. Total and absolute death waiting for her. Vane's men were waiting for her around the corner and they were going to kill her there in plain sight. Oh God, oh good Lord, she was too young, she had dreams, aspirations, a better life just waiting for her to grab it. She shared a look with her family and gulped. They all looked very serious. She tried to put on a brave face.

"I'm coming with you; After all, it will be just a second, right?" Her father's face was deadly serious. He stepped forward "I'm going with you, your brothers can stay here to explain if we don't return to finish our shift" Alexandra wanted to scream him not to come. She if was in trouble, the others should stay away. She couldn't even ask Joe or Sam to come instead. She knew that her brothers would survive if something happened to their father, even if it broke their hearts, but it would kill their father to lose one of them without him putting up a fight.

They walked together, following the boy, and Alex could have cried when she saw Mister Scott waiting in the other side of the street. Her father smiled at her and gave her shoulder a light squeeze before kissing her cheek and going back to her brothers. It wasn't a trap after all. Alex let out the air she hadn't realized had been holding. She was smiling lightly while walking to where Mister Scott was waiting when, after turning on a corner, a pair of hands came out of a dark alley and dragged her to the shadows.

Alex tried to scream bloody murder, but one of those hands covered her mouth, and she felt herself been carried away, unable to make a sound. She felt her eyes watering in fear, and made strangled noises as loud as she could. But to no avail. Her dad was already too far to help her, and Mister Scott hadn't noticed.

Adrenaline rushing through her veins, instinct took over. She lashed out with her elbows, trying to shake off the iron grip over her. She kicked and trashed, and when she felt herself being carried deeper into the alley she let herself fall, so her captor had to either let her fall or being made to sustain her dead weight. She didn't expect to be lifted like she weighted nothing. She delivered a couple of kicks before she was tossed to the floor. She scrambled to her feet and tried to run in the opposite direction, but the hand came to grab her neck and forced her still. Fingers dug in the muscles of her neck, and she let out a sharp cry as a jolt of pain made her twist in her assailant's grip. She was panting and could feel her heart beating in her chest.

"Be still" She recognized that husky voice. Vane. Now that she knew it was him and stopped struggling she could smell him. Sweat, alcohol and something that was only Vane. But that was underneath a lot of sweat and alcohol. Ugh. She distanced herself as much as she could and turned around to look at him. "You are a tough son of a bitch aren't you? Like a rabid rabbit or something, you are too tiny, for being anything else, kid" Vane had a few bruises for yesterday night, but that was all. He didn't look like he had gotten into a brawl. He let her go of her, only to come as close as he could and inspect her with those piercing, critical blue eyes. Alex shivered, and she couldn't tell if it was all fear or not. She wanted to kick herself. It wasn't the moment for that kind of thoughts. She was about to get trashed, or worse, killed!

Vane lifted her chin to look at her face "And a resilient one, looks like I got you good last night, never seen an eye turn green from a punch before" She rolled her eyes "Not the first one that tells me that today" Vane laughed again. So great he found her so bloody funny. Well, at least, if he was laughing at her, he wasn't hurting her. "Have you gotten in any other fights yesterday, to have people saying that to you?" She said the safest thing for her brothers that was close enough to the truth that he wouldn't be able to tell that she wasn't being completely sincere. "Boys at work think they are so funny in the mornings" Vane let her go and she put some distance between them. Well, as much distance as the narrow alley allowed her. She eyed the exit, but Vane positioned himself in a way that left her totally trapped.

"What do you want, Captain Vane? I have work to do, and my break is not that long" she prayed he let her go already; let her go already, come on, she has had enough adventures for a long while. Vane looked at her with an intensity that made her nervous. He grabbed her by the chin and forced her to turn her head to one side, then the other. His lips tightened. Their eyes met and Alex felt hot all over. She lowered her eyes, but to no avail. She was treated with an up close peep to his chiseled tanned chest. Did this man know how to dress properly? It seemed He did not. The shirt he wore was open, revealing a muscled chest and set of bronze abs, framed by the once white shirt tucked into the high waisted pants.

"I certainly made a number of your face" he clicked his tongue in displeasure. Vane reached into his pocket, and Alex stilled, ready for him to pull a gun, or a knife, or something. Her eyes got big as saucers when he pulled out a little can that he opened to reveal a greasy ointment of a weird yellow-green color and that filled the alley with the spicy smell of herbs. He walked to her, and Alex backed away until her back bumped into something solid. He had effectively trapped her against a wall, again. That was the second time in less than twenty four hours that she had been cornered by this man. It was a dangerous thing to allow that to happen; one of the first things she had learnt was that being left without an escape route meant half the battle was already lost. If Alex wasn't so terrified she would be enraged by now.

Vane used his other hand to lift her face holding her chin and making her move her head from one side and the other several times. Then he hummed and looked at her in the eye. So. SO BLUE. Alex could practically feel her panties trying to escape her trousers. "Stay still, it will help you heal faster" Vane then proceeded to dip two fingers into the ointment and carefully (Alex would have never thought he could be able to deliver such tender caresses upon other person's skin) rubbed it on her wounds.

He was so careful, that she barely noticed, and when she did, wincing, Vane would stop, and wait for her pain to pass before reassuming his task. Soon, he had rubbed a thin layer all over her wounds. All her hair was standing; she was covered in goose bumps. And Alex was pretty close to moaning, she was trembling from head to toe because of the gentle touched of this apparently rough but tender pirate. She was shocked. And excited. Alex didn't dare to move of speak, she wasn't even breathing too loud, scared she would break the spell and whatever magic that kept Vane tame and tender would fly out the metaphorical window.

After inspecting her face once again, he nodded to himself and extended a hand to grab her shirt. At this Alex jumped back against the wall with her eyes open wide. "I need to put it on your other wounds. If it's so bad you need bandages, you need this" The spell broke. But it wasn't Vane who went feral. It was her.

She slapped his hand away and bared her teeth "Do NOT touch me" Vane looked surprised by her reaction and stepped back, baffled. He raised his arm again and she reacted crouching and getting ready to attack and scape "Keep your hands away from me!" she howled, and Vane actually took a step back from her, surprised.

Vane was rendered speechless before her actions and lifted his arms with the palms up, one still holding the can of ointment. "Easy there, Bunny, do not bite my hand when I'm just trying to help. It is good for those blacks and blues on your skin. Even for the green parts. Just take your shirt off and let me extend it on the skin" She moved towards the exit, and Vane didn't try to stop her, just moving so he was in front of her at all times. "You will keep your hands away from my shirt. Are we clear?" she practically growled at him.

Vane seemed to catch on and grew more serious, frowning. "You don't want me to see you? If you have scars it's not a problem. I'm a pirate, it's not like you would show me something shocking" and Alex was sure of it. Vane was a very popular bedmate among the women of Nassau; he surely was an expert in their anatomy. Alex practically growled again and stared at him stubbornly. "You will not see me naked. No one is going to see me naked" Ah, and wasn't it sad that she was so right about that statement? She would never have a normal life in Nassau. She had to escape for that. Leave that pirate nest behind.

Vane should stop trying to press her against a wall, and rub her face with ointment, and then try to rub said ointment all over her torso. That added to the dreams she had that night made her even more sensible at Vane's influence. Damn that bloody pirate.

Vane frowned and stared at her. None moved as they stood one in front of the other in that dark alley. Alex's chest still heaving after her burst and Vane standing there still with his hands up extended towards her trying to show her he wasn't a threat. He looked deep in thought. Alex, after a moment to order her thoughts, blushed to the roots of her hair. He had only been kind to her, beating aside, and he was trying to mend thing by treating the wound he had caused. And yet there she was, snarling and threatening and acting like a rabid dog. She abandoned her defensive stance and look at Vane's boots, too embarrassed to look at him in the face. Weird enough Vane's frown deepened and he seemed to look at her with other eyes. A strange look she missed. Something changed. And even if she didn't know, this was the moment that would mark her life. The moment where Charles Vane decided he was going to make sure that little bunny of a boy was safer than before. Both of them talked at the same time.

"Look Bunny…"

"Captain Vane…"

They both fell silent, and Alex dared to look at him in the eyes. She shivered under his gaze. What was that man thinking to look at her so intensely? Again they both tried to speak at the same time.

"You see…"

"Captain, I…"

They feel silent again, and Alex thought this was getting ridiculous.

"I'm sorry Captain Vane, I shouldn't have reacted that way when you were only trying to help". Vane smiled at her words, and Alex felt herself blushing harder. Oh good Lord that man's smile was sinfully sweet. It was too pure and innocent to belong in the face of a ruthless pirate like Charles Vane. Vane came closer, and this time, Alex didn't even flinch. "It's okay Bunny, after all, I was the one who beat you up last night" Vane extended his hand towards her, silently asking for permission to take hers and Alex met him halfway through. Vane took her hand with infinite care and put in her open palm, the ointment can.

He closed her fingers around it and gently patted her closed fist. "Make sure to put it on your wounds, it'll make the bruises fade. If your side hurts and you have trouble breathing, tighten the bandages and stop dragging heavy stuff around. You are such a brute, Bunny, to be working in the docks with broken ribs like it's nothing". And then, he put his giant hand in her shoulder, gave a light squeeze and left the alley in long strides.

Alex was left there, mouth hanging open. What did just happen? She looked at the ointment in her hand and then turned to watch Vane's form walking away. She pocketed the can and left to meet with Mister Scott.

The man looked at her serious as always. "Alexander, I trust your conversation with Captain Vane was satisfactory?" he asked like he was asking about the weather. Alex looked at him, feeling betrayed. They had done this to her? True that they might have known that Vane didn't mean her harm, but, they had arranged it so he could ambush her? Alex felt anger welling up inside her. And she frowned. Mister Scott ignored her. "Miss Eleanor wants you to take a couple of days before you return to your work at the tavern, but afterwards we expect you to keep doing your job"

He left her and Alex wanted nothing more that punch him. And then hurl something heavy at Eleanor Guthrie's head.

She went back to her family, and her day passed as any other day, except she didn't go to Miss Guthrie's tavern that night. Or the day after that. And every night, she would carefully use the ointment in her wounds, and in her dreams, there were blue eyes that stared at her like she was a puzzle to be solved, and gentle hands touched her with callouses born of days using a sword. It took her three days to be free of bruises, but she couldn't be freed from Charles Vane. He haunted her. She dreamt of him, and found herself daydreaming about his eyes, or his chest of his husky voice. Alex took to carry the can of ointment around with her at all times, and sometimes she would put her hand on her pocket and pet it.

She got it bad. She knew it was a lost cause from the very beginning. Her heart skipped a beat every time she caught a glimpse of the pirate around Nassau. She saw him in the market when she was busy grocery shopping with Sam. Other day, she saw him in the docks, gingerly munching on an apple as he casually watched her work. He father had noticed and that day she was never left alone, Joe, Sam always trying to block his sight of her. The third day, she crossed him while returning home from the docks, a fresh loaf of bread in her arms. He had nodded at her, and smiled. She had awkwardly nodded back, and hurried up, blushing like a tomato.

At last, when she finally was able to go back to work, all hell broke loose. A business went wrong had ended in thousands in black pearls lost to the sea and Max, the French whore, who was to blame, according to gossip, had fell in Vane's crew bad side. They had taken her and made her their bed slave to pay them back.

Of course Miss Eleanor wouldn't have taken it too kindly if she knew. Max was her whore, everyone knew it. Miss Eleanor had gone to meet with Vane that day. Everyone in the tavern was tense, and Mister Scott let them leave earlier because of that. They were more likely to be at each other's throats that keep the peace like they should.

Alex couldn't help but think of Vane even more than the last three days combined. A Captain that gambled with the wealth of his crew and didn't turn profit wouldn't be captain for long. Then again, that wasn't her problem. It was Vane's.

She was walking home when her hand found the little can in her pocket, and that was enough to stop her dead in her tracks. Could she help him, somehow? She couldn't give him the money back. And she wouldn't be able to sway his crew if they went against him. An idea appeared in her mind.

She ran home, changed clothes, and left the precious locket her mother had and the tiny can safe in her room, before grabbing a small sack and some rope and ran. She arrived at the wrecks and started asking around about what had happened that night. Apparently, a true show since everyone had been chasing everyone around all night. At last, one of the old men told her where they had fished out Jack Rackham in exchange for some rum she had taken with her. Alex found a good spot to tie a line and used the rope to make sure she would be able to pull herself out of the water. Then she carefully hid most of her clothes and her boots in a crack and dived.

It took her the rest of the evening, and several breaks, and by the time she was done she was shivering and tired beyond measure. But in the tiny sack she took with her, where twenty shiny black pearls she had rescued from the sand at the bottom of the sea. Maybe that would be enough to keep Vane as Captain of the Ranger's crew. Maybe not. In any case, she had made up her mind. She would return the ointment and the pearls, and consider then their debt repaid, and the strange bond between then broken.

By the time she had made it back to her house to retrieve the ointment, and form them the port and the place where Vane and his crew lived, she was practically dead on her feet, and sneezing. Damn that stupid water. She had her precious cargo stuck inside her bandages, close to her heart. She arrived too late. Miss Eleanor was there, and Max too. Tied up, naked and bruised, and Eleanor was there screaming bloody murder to them all. Alex saw Vane in a corner, and their eyes met briefly. Alex's eyes widened, and without thinking it twice, she turned tail and ran back home like all demons of hell where on her tail. Things were about to get really bad. And she better be far, far away when that happened.

She got home, not even talking to her family, fish out the pearls and the can of ointment and threw them in a tiny hold in the floor where she had all her savings. She knew that Miss Eleanor just condemned Vane to death, without his ship, and his crew and in an island full of people who would love to see Charles Vane brought up to his knees. She tucked herself in bed and cried until she fell asleep. Somehow, even if they had only interacted three times and only properly spoke once, she didn't want him dead.

After that day, Alex couldn't remember much. Fever took her, and days were spent coughing and sweating, surrounded by her family and the doctor they had brought when she didn't seem to recover. In her feverish dreams, she saw Vane dead, covered in blood and sand, she saw him buried and she cried. Her mind replayed again and again the last time she saw him, his eyes the eyes of a man who knew he was dead. Eleanor's screams never let her rest, and the blue eyes of a savage pirate were the only thing that kept her calm during coughing fits.


	3. A Panther in the Moonlight

Alex's lungs were doing their best to try and escape her body with every violent fit of coughing. She hadn't been delirious for the last three days, but she would rather not be conscious for this. Her ribs hurt from all the coughing, her throat was raw and she was trembling all the time. She couldn't remember when was the last time she was able to breath properly through her nose.

She shouldn't have gone look for those pearls. She shouldn't have. Alex didn't know what had possessed her to try and help Vane with such a foolish plan. She thought of the small satchel of pearls hiding under her room in the false floor.

She thought about Max's screams of pain, and Eleanor's howls of rage. Charles Vane's eyes burnt her. The look in his eyes. The pain, the sadness, the acceptance of his fate. Alex shivered.

She started coughing again and could barely breathe. Chest heaving, she joisted herself out of her bed to fetch more water and to relieve herself before she soiled the bed during a fit. Her father and brothers were working, Sam and Joe taking turns at the tavern to cover her up. Alex was alone. She cleaned herself up and sat for a few minutes in the porch, breathing in the fresh air, even if it was the smouldering air of the middle of the day. She preferred it to the stale air of her room. With a sigh, she went back in and opened the window just a sliver, enough for some light breeze to enter. Alex finally made it back to her bed. She was pretty bored already. She even tried some embroidery like her mom used to teach her.

Before she knew it, she had begun a handkerchief where a bunch of small blue forget-me-nots bordered the white square of fabric entangled with an ivy plant. When Alex realized what she had been doing, she dropped the fabric and the thread and ran back to the porch as fast as she could. Forget-me-nots, the flower the lovers gave each other upon a long separation. Ivy, the strangler that snares the unsuspecting in traps of love until they are too far gone to escape. What was happening to her? It had been only two days. Two! The first of those, he had beaten her up! For god's sake, she was in trouble. She couldn't be right in the head.

A pirate. A filthy, merciless bloodthirsty brute. Why? It couldn't be his personality, she barely knew him. It couldn't be his looks, hard body and enticing eyes notwithstanding. True that he had been kind, and understanding. He had behaved far better than many men who called themselves gentlemen. He had been so gentle with her wounds, gave her space when she needed it, keeping his distance once he saw she was uncomfortable. And then it was what she had seen while working for Miss Guthrie. He had been so sweet when he had been with Eleanor. Even after she dumped him, he had always treated her like an equal. He had captured prizes for her and threatened anyone who disrespected her. Always trying to get in her good graces, but apparently, never doing enough to appease her.

Alex was in trouble. She didn't notice she had paid so much attention to Vane apart from the whole 'Big Bad Pirate do not cross or interact with'. But apparently she was attracted to the man, to give it a name, though she sensed it was way deeper than that.

She rubbed her eyes. Alex tried to breathe, but a coughing fit brought her to her knees. Lungs burning, she went back to the house and tried to brew herself some tea. With peppermint on it, the brew should help her ride the flu out. When her drink was ready Alex went back to her bed and her work, careful with every stich, paying attention to all the details. She poured that tangle of feelings brewing in her chest right by the see of mucus obstructing her lungs into the handkerchief. Maybe one day she would give it to someone she could love freely. She was resolver to drain all her interest in Vane through the thread and into the fabric.

By the time Alex was allowed back to work, in her pockets always were the small can of ointment and the embroidered handkerchief. The day she returned was, compared to her last few weeks, fairly normal. Some ships came back with prizes, some came to fill their storage rooms with good to sell, and Alex and her family hoisted everything up and down. Then, she walked to the tavern at sundown to keep an eye on things. Minus a couple of drunks who started a fight, it was even calmer than usual. Then again, no crewmembers of the Ranger were around to cause trouble with the other crews.

Dinner was a quiet affair, everyone pleasantly tires eating in the porch while watching the stars. Joe was getting serious with the girl he was courting, a sweet girl whose parents owned a small plantation inland. He sounded deeply in love. Sam and Alex listened and smiled as he recounted for the seventh time that day the brief walk they shared when he escorted back to her house from the market.

The next days where pretty much the same, everything calm and not a single pirate from the Ranger in sight. Which meant Alex got curious, since the ship was still anchored in the bay. At first Alex chastised herself and ignored the need of knowing what had become of Captain Vane. Then it became too much and decided that a little tiny bit of information never hurt anyone before. So she waited a prudent time before start asking around. Which basically meant at the fourth day her resolve to keep away from Charles Vane turn to ash and got blown by the wind. After her shift as peacekeeper at the bar she went looking for Tom, Eleanor's third in command after Mister Scott, and the man who had taught Alex how to win a tavern fight. Tom had half adopted Alex as a little brother of sorts, watching over her in her family's place while she worked.

"Hi Tom, quiet night, right?" Tom smiled when he watched her arrive and got up from the chair where he was, and served her a drink "Yep, pretty quiet. How are you feeling? Better?" Alex shrugged "A little bit under the weather, but I'll recover, don't worry" Tom laughed "yeah, if there is someone who could say that while panting like mad, it'll be you" he chastised her. After listening to Alex breathing hard and puffing and panting for a day, Tom had suggested she stayed at home a couple of days more. But then again, there was no way she could shook the last remnants of her flu and breathe properly with her chest bandaged. So she had politely told him to go fuck himself and went right back to work. Alex snorted "well in my defence, I have always have trouble breathing, you know it" Tom shook his head "and here you are, picking fights" Alex nodded and took a drink "And here I am, keeping peace". Tom smiled and went back to his drink.

They drank in silence, until Alex asked about Vane. "Him?" Tom asked "Isn't he the one that beat you to pulp?" Alex reddened and nodded "Well, don't worry, he's as good as dead" Alex's eyes widened, Tom laughed "yep, Miss Eleanor gave his men a choice, desert him or starve" Alex had difficulties swallowing the next sip of her beer. "Of course most of his crew left him. He's passed out in his tent most of the time, or getting in one fight or another. He'll end up dead one of these days" Alex nodded and gave a half smile. Tom clapped her in the back and they cleaned up and prepare to leave for their houses. He had only meant to reassure the poor boy that he was safe. Alex was terrorized. Vane was as good as dead? Laying in his tent drinking himself to an early grave?

Alex wandered to the beach, she just wanted to take a quick peek. Vane was in his tent, and Alex got closer, careful not to get caught. He didn't look that bad. Just a fellow having a drink. He even had a woman with him. Alex smiled, shaking her head. She had been a fool for thinking that would be the end of Charles Vane. She turned and went back home.

"How was your evening, darling?" asked her father when she crossed the door. "Great daddy, just one fight in the whole night" she answered as she shed her clothes and went to kiss her father and brother in the cheek. "I'm dead on my feet though". Sam got up and offered her his arm "you are still recovering, sweetie, here, let me help you to bed" Alex swatted him away "I'm fiiiine worry wart, it's just that I'm tired" Sam sighed "as you like, Joe is already in bed, we should be retiring too, right father?" Their father was already blowing off the candles, and just smiled and nodded. Alex went to her room, and took off her clothes and the bandages around her chest. Ah, how nice to breathe properly again. Sometimes she thought that corsets like the ones her mother used to wear would be less restricting. Once she was on her nightgown, she dropped on the bed and groaned. She was so tired….

She. Was. LATE.

Her day had been horrible from the start. She overslept, and even in her free day, she had a million things to do around the house. She had to rush to wash some clothes so she could leave them hanging while she cleaned up the house a little bit, change the sheets in her room and have time to make it to the market and back in time to fold everything and have at last, some time to relax. She had her basket full, its heavy weight already taking a toll in her arm, and was ready to head back home when she saw them. Jack Rackham and Anne Bonny whispering furiously right by one of the stands. Alex got closer, examining the goods, sweets of all kind and tried to pay attention. "You gotta do something Jack, he's gonna die if he keeps this up. Drink, whores, fights or drugs. That's how this is gonna end. Charles Vane, drowned in his own piss and vomit" "And what would you have me to do?" "something, we are tied to him now, he falls, we follow"

Vane. Vane? He wasn't that good after all, was he? Drowning in piss and vomit? Alex bought some sweets and hurried back home, thinking of some way she could help. She had none. She prepared some supper for her family and waited their return in her room. There she paced. It was all for nothing. Her father and brothers came back, they dinned while they made a ruckus trying to talk over each other about their day, but nothing could distract Alex from Vane. What if he just needed some help? Just enough to go back to the right path, well, the path that didn't lead to self-destruction and death.

Charles Vane wasn't nothing hers. Not her friend, not her family, not her lover. She didn't have to risk life and limb for him. She didn't have to care about him. She was most definitely going to stick his nose in the man's business because for some reason, she couldn't stop obsessing over him. Stupid sweet pirates who look at you with big, blue, puppy dog eyes and caress your face like it was made of porcelain and wear their shirts like buttons weren't a thing.

Alex decided that she wasn't going to be visiting Vane without taking a bath first. Not only it was part of her free day ritual, she was pretty sure the stink would be bad enough without adding her own week of dirt and sweat to the mix. She took her time to haul the water from the stove to the tub, and boiled some for the rest of them. Sam and Joe were grateful for it and retired to their rooms with the buckets of steaming water in their hands. Alex returned to her room, where she scrubbed herself clean, and redressed in fresh clothes. She put her hat on and looked at her reflection on the small mirror she had. Very nice, for a girl trying to pass as a man.

Carefully, Alex opened her window and climbed out of the house, trying not even breathe too loud. She was halfway down to the main road when a heavy hand landed on her shoulder. Alex screamed and turned around just to found her father's angry dace illuminated by the moon.

"Alexandra Caroline Randall, What do you think you are doing?" Alex swallowed hard. For all his doting and good manners, her father held them tight to his side ever since their mother was murdered. This didn't look good. "A friend is in trouble Da, I only wanted to check on them" He father arched a brow. But it was better than her saying him instead of them. "What kind of trouble?" Alex, knowing her father had a kind heart, decided to do the horrible, horrible thing and lie to his face. "My friend fell in with a bad person. This guy has got her in trouble Da, she's drinking so much… and doing drugs and everything!" It wasn't that far from the truth. In all the time she guarded the tavern Alex never ever saw Charles Vane drunk himself half to death. And that made it two years of complete sobriety out of the window because of Eleanor Guthrie. "I just wanted to talk to her, now at a time the man is not around, she may listen to me" or he would stab her in the neck and leave her to rot in the beach, who knew.

Her father sighed "Alex, you cannot risk yourself this way, Nassau is dangerous" "But Daaaaa, I've been working in that tavern for two years, and never ever something bad happened to me" she whined. "I'll go with you, maybe between the two of us we can convince that girl to leave the man that misguides her. I'm sure it's a pirate, isn't he? That scum only brings trouble to the honest men" her father offered, with a smile. Alex felt her stomach falling to her toes. "No Da, you can't!" her father arched a brow at her, Alex started sweating "Look Da, she confided in me the other day, telling me how things were, asked me to keep it a secret. If she knows I told you, she'll get angry at me and she may never listen, and get into trouble. More trouble, I mean, than before" Her father made a face. Yes! Success was close enough to taste "so you see Da, you'll have to trust your daughter who knows how to kick ass and wait home for me to come back. Or even better, go to bed straight away. I don't have to go to the docks tomorrow, but you do. I'll tell you how it went when I bring you supper. I promise"

Her father seemed to think about it a few minutes, and then sighed and squeezed her hand before letting her go. "Fine Sweetie, but know that I cannot afford to lose you, if something ever happens to you, my heart will break." Alex bid her father farewell and went on her merry way.

It wasn't very difficult to sneak into Vane's camp, even at night. The place was silent as a graveyard. It was even easier to get inside Vane's tent. The man was lying on the floor, on top of pieces of cloth that could have been sheets or really thin carpets, which have seen better times. They were stained, and the place stunk. Piss, vomit, sweat, everything mixed in a horrible olfactory assault that nearly has her running back home. Her eyes watered as she was trying to contain the need to throw up.

Vane was lying there, unresponsive. Alex was pretty sure she knew the cause. Surrounding him there were several empty bottles and a pipe. The man must have had a private party, just him, his misery, and booze and drugs to kill a whale.

Alex hurried to his side, checking his pulse. Yes, there it was. Alex tried not to think much about the surprisingly soft skin under her hands as she moved him and his stupid heavy dead weight into a better position. His clothes were filthy, for lack of a better word, but she wasn't about to change them. She barely knew the man! Alex examined his face and torso for injuries. He had some shallow cuts and purple bruises, not to be surprised, he had been picking fights with anything that moved for the past weeks. She searched the tent until she found some water, and, miracle of miracles, her scarf!

There, lying tucked in a corner, was her blue scarf, the one she used to wear under her hat. She had thought she had lost it that night so long ago that Tom and her had to drag Vane back to his camp. It had been washed and pressed, and she thought it a true pity to use it, but it was the only piece of clothing that seemed to be somewhat clean in the room, if one didn't count her own clothes. And as sure as she wasn't changing Charles Vane's clothes it was that she wasn't stripping so she could use her clean shirt to wash the man.

As soon as she started washing up his chest the man stirred, but it wasn't until she reached his neck that Vane opened his eyes. Alex jumped, seen those eyes piercing through her soul. The wind blew and the candles flickered, making shadows dance across their skin. "You are a mess, I'm just trying to help" blurted out Alex, fidgeting with the strand of Vane's her she had under her hand. "I have seen better looking corpses" Vane looked at her with an intensity that shocked her. "Fuck you" said the captain. Alex let out a nervous bout of laughter. "Don't worry, I'll be out of your hair when I'm sure you won't die on your own piss. Just let me help" Vane's eyes were fixed in her face, but Alex realised his pupils were blown wide, and his eyes, glassy. He was high as a kite. Whatever he was seeing, it wasn't her. Alex only prayed the vision was a friendly one.

"What the fuck did I ever do to you?" Alex stared, but kept cleaning him up methodically. Wash, rinse, repeat. It gave her something to do while she tried to think about a way to get the man back on track. "You beat me up" She answered, only because it seemed weird not to, even if he wasn't talking to her "You beat me up, made me drag you around" She continued. Chest clean, it was her turn to star washing up his face. She took her time, gently cleaning his bruises and washing away the dried blood. "You stalked me, made Mister Scott set me up. You took care of my wounds, you were… nice" His face twisted, he looked ready to cry. Alex dropped the cloth in the basin and rubbed soothing circles on his shoulders, trying to make him feel better. She tried not to think about the fact that this man had a body to die for and was half naked. He was under emotional distress.

"I swore I loved you" He turned his face away from her and Alex's heart twisted. Eleanor Guthrie. She didn't know if feel offended for the confusion or not. "And you destroyed me" Alex's heart stopped twisting and just broke. Poor man. Alex stroked his cheek "Aaaaaw, fella, you are worth more than what she's selling you for. You just need to believe that yourself" Alex took out the little can that had been her faithful companion during her illness and the days after, and slowly rubbed the ointment on Vane's wounds. "It funny how it goes the full cycle around don't you think? You gave it to me, now I give it to you…. This should make us even… yes?" Alex finished her task, and wiped her hands on the already soiled scarf. She sighed. Those stains would take forever to come out.

Vane chose that moment of distraction to gasp and rise from the pile of clothing he was lying in. His eyes were still glassy and his pupils dilated. Alex backed and rose to her knees as fast as she could, try to get him back to lay down on the floor. As soon as her hand touched his chest Vane focused her gaze on her, licked his lips, and bent down to kiss Alex. She made no noise, frozen in place by the surprise. His breath tasted like something dead and rotten, but his lips where thin and soft and his stubble scratched her face in a pleasant way. His hand softly caressed her hair and her neck, tickling her. He moved against her like she was made of glass, and Alex closed her eyes and sighed, giving herself up. The kiss lasted less than a minute, but was enough. Her heart pounded inside her chest like it was trying to escape, and she was panting by the time they parted.

Then Vane sated at some point behind her, got up, and ran. Alex was left inside the tent, confused and blushing. When she realised what happened, she quickly blew out the candles and ran after the pirate captain.

Alex tried to keep him in sight but after a few wild turns, she lost him. Afraid and not knowing what to do, she stopped in a corner and watched the people go around, trying to clear her mind. She resorted to ask around if someone had seen Charles Vane. Lucky she, the man tumbling down the street was something people tended to notice and gave her directions. She followed him to a lonely alley, where she heard the familiar sound of someone being beat half to death. Cloaked in shadows, Alex closed the distance between them and her. It was Noonan, the owner of the brothel, and his boys. She trembled. She had to help Charles, but they were four, and she wasn't armed. Why didn't she take her cutlass with her that night?

Vane threw up, and Noonan had a gun pointing at his head. Alex gasped, horrified… and the pistol backfired.

Everything that happened after was a blurr. Vane rose and next thing she knew, they were all dead. Eyes big as saucers, she watched Vane standing there covered in filth and blood, looking in the moonlight every bit the beast everyone thought him to be. Alex gasped, and Vane turned to look at her. She trembled. Shit. Why always her? She needed to get her survival instinct back.

"Bunny?" was the confused question the pirate asked "What are you doing in here?" Alex swallowed. Did he remember about earlier? Gods above and below she hoped he did not. "I'm here to get you back to your tent" she said, with more confidence that she felt. "You are a mess" she added. Vane looked at himself, and the scene around him. "Go home Bunny, you will get blood on your clothes if you came closer" He actually stepped away. Alex tried to get closer, but he half growled, and pushed past her, careful not to dirty her clothes. "Go home Bunny, it's not safe for a little boy like you out here" He disappeared into the shadows. Alex felt herself redden. "And Whose fault is that?!" she screamed to the night, to Vane's retreating back. He paused, and half turned to her. With his hair across his face, blue eyes gleaming and the rest of him in shadows and covered in blood, He very much looked like one of those panthers she had heard about. A dangerous predator. "I wouldn't be following you around if half the town wasn't gossiping about how you are trying your damn best to get yourself killed!" Vane seemed to doubt for a moment what to do. In the end, he huffed and looked pretty uncomfortable before he abruptly turned around and went back to his camp. Or at least that's where she thought he was headed to.

Alex sighed and shook her head, carefully avoided the mess in the floor and went back home. She wasn't going to tell her Da anything about this. She wasn't even going to think of it. She was just going to get to bed, and sleep.


	4. Permission to grieve

Alex tried very hard to ignore Vane now that he seemed to be recovering. He still had a limp, three days after the fight in that dirty little alley. Not that Alex noticed or something, not that she was creepily stalking him from afar. She just happened to look at him a lot.

But, in her defence, the man was being suspicious as fuck. Not only he did a fair amount of staring of his own, he kept coming close like he was going to talk to her, but ended walking pass her all the times he did that, scaring the ever-loving piss out of her family, to the point where Sam asked her if Vane had threatened her life again, and if she wanted him to talk to miss Eleanor for protection. After what Vane said to the hallucination of Eleanor Guthrie in his tent, Alex would rather eat her boots.

Vane would appear from out of the blue when she was done working at the docks, watching over her family and their playful banter. Alex would blink and he would be gone, but he always came back. Then, whenever her family couldn't walk her home from the tavern, Vane mysteriously appeared like magic after she left town, and walked at least a hundred paces behind her all the way till she got home.

Alex wanted to even things out, and it just made them even worse.

It was her desire of fixing things up, or at least make them slightly better for the sake of her family's sanity, that made her be standing awkwardly in front of the brothel that was now owned by Vane, Rackham and Bonny. Everyone was talking about how Mister Noonan had sold the thing to them to settle the whore problem they had, but Alex knew the truth, hidden in a dirty alley and showered in blood. In the end her plan of waiting patiently in the shadows for Vane went out of the window as the Madame, that horrible old woman covered in makeup and full of self-importance saw what she thought was a young man trying very hard not to be notice at the door, and dragged her inside with a dashing smile and promises of pleasure beyond her imagination.

So now Alex was trying very hard not to faint or throw up while surrounded by half naked women and a Madame that offered girl after girl no matter how much Alex said she wasn't interested. The moment Alex saw Vane on top of the stairs, it wasn't only the man she had been waiting for, for half her morning, but it was a life line to escape from the whores downstairs. Vane was looking at her as one girl tried to shove her face down to her uncovered bosom. Alex practically ran upstairs, and Vane moved to greet her. She was panting. "Hi" she said, somehow, shyer than she expected. Vane, to her surprise, averted his eyes, and honest to god blushed. "Hi there, eehr, Bunny" Alex took a deep breath and offered him a kind smile " I kind of wanted to talk to you" his eyes darted to her face for a second before they found the wall behind her incredibly interesting "Sure, sure thing, ah, Here?" He was nervous. He was nervous! Even more than she was!

Alex couldn't believe it. "If you want?" she said. Vane then took her hand and dragged her away. Alex stumbled behind him, and he seemed to realize what he was doing, and abruptly let her go. "Sorry Bunny, forgot you don't like people touching you" Alex was staring to get nervous. Charles Vane been self-conscious, god grief it was the apocalypse. On the other hand, she saw the man throwing his guts out and crying like a babe because of Eleanor Guthrie, so, there was that. "Follow me" Vane said, and entered a room at their right. For good or bad, Alex went in right after him.

Inside the room, Vane took seat in one couch that faced a balcony from which the bay looked lovelier than ever, sparkling blue water and golden sand under the sun. It even looked respectable, if one pretended the ships floating in the sea were merchants instead of pirates. "So" Vane said, looking quite uncomfortable "What did you wanted to talk about?" Alex felt her heart pounding in her chest like a wild thing. "I just… wanted to know if you were okay?" Vane's eyes focused on hers for a moment, and she saw raw desperation in there "Did Eleanor sent you?"

Alex felt bad, she even thought of lying to him, but that would have been cruel and he didn't deserve it. "No" He looked away at the bay. Alex felt pretty uncomfortable, the silence stretched to the point she felt the urge to fill it somehow. "I was worried" she admitted. Vane nearly broke his neck from turning around so hard. "You? Why?" Alex felt herself blush, the level of awkwardness was pretty high. "I have been asking myself that for a couple of weeks now" she sighed "I don't really know, I just feel like you are worth more than dying in the middle of your own filth because of Eleanor Guthrie" she flinched after saying that last part, sure she had messed up big time. It was just common sense not to badmouth Eleanor Guthrie or even speak of her with the tone Alex used, not in front of Charles Vane.

Vane let out a sad laugh. Self-depreciating, if a laugh could be like that "Bunny, you are a funny one" Alex rubbed his left arm with her right hand "Listen, erh, Captain Vane? Listen, just, What I saw on that tent? You are pretty decent, I mean, for a pirate, you see? So, It would be a damn shame you kicked the bucket like that"

"In my own filth?" he chuckled. Alex nodded. Vane got up like someone had lighted the cushion on fire. He knelt in front of a drawer and brought to Alex something hidden away in his closed fist. One of his hand was hiding behind his back. "Look Bunny, I kind of remember stuff that I'm pretty sure It wasn't real, and I kind of remember stuff that I'm pretty sure it's more possible it really happened" He took another step forward towards Alex, and she had trouble breathing properly. He extended the closed fist towards her "Thanks Bunny, but keep it, you might need it, if you get in more fights" it was the ointment can. Vane looked so uncomfortable that Alex lost no time in retrieving the small can and shoving it back in her pocket. She wouldn't admit it, but she had missed toying with it when she was thinking in this and that. "How did you know it was me?" Vane shook his head "Look Bunny, it was pretty clear it was you, I made that thing, it's impossible someone else has one with that smell" Alex just muttered a soft "Oh, okay" and averted her eyes, looking anywhere but Vane. She felt a little bit ashamed for making the question. Of course he would have known it was hers. He gave it to her.

Wait. He made that himself? Alex's heart fluttered. Oh, oh. That was… He had thought he had hurt a boy, and the man before her took the time to make him some ointment, put it on a can, track the boy down and gave it to him. That was… a sweeter gesture than she had thought. Vane, for all his roughness, was surprisingly soft in the inside.

Vane then brought forward the hand he had kept hidden behind his back. Her blue scarf, clean once again, not a trace of dirt or body fluids. Alex gasped. Vane smiled at her reaction. "I wanted to give it back, but it got dirty again. Sorry, tried to clean it the best I could" Alex took it, and their hands briefly touched, and a spark of something went thought Alex's arm and straight to her belly. She bit back a whimper and took the scarf to put it around her neck. It even smelled nice. Alex wondered if Vane had someone wash it or if he had washed it himself. Probably, he had, like he had made the ointment himself. Alex resisted the impulse of snuggling in her scarf. That man was going to give her cavities. She wanted to smile as wide as she could, but she resisted.

"Come, Bunny" Vane said, and guided her to another chair so she could sit down. For the first time she notice the food on the small table between the chairs. Vane sat, and cut a piece of bread and some cheese and gave it to her, gesturing towards the other chair "Here, you need to eat or you'll be a runt forever" Alex huffed and puffed, but sat and ate the food she was given. "I ain't no runt, and my name, is Alex, not Bunny" Vane laughed. "Well, you look like one. A rabid bunny. Cute and small and fierce" She blushed and resorted to eat a big bite, so she wouldn't have to answer that.

"Answer me this, Alex boy, How come I never saw you at Guthrie's after she fucked me up? Not that I was allowed in, you see, but I went by to get some rum and you weren't there" Alex averted her eyes, uncomfortable. If he asked the right questions, she would spill. She knew it. It wasn't in her nature to lie. But she had to. She had been lying most of her life. She could look at Charles Vane's trusting eyes and lie at his face "I caught a cold" she said "just that" Alex hoped he would be satisfied with that. "A cold that lasted two weeks?" Alex sighed "Close to three. Miss Guthrie was very nice to let me keep my job after being absent so long. I'll not bathe in cold water in a very, very long time, you can be sure of it" When he just nodded and grabbed an apple to munch on, she barely could held the sigh of relief. Vane just watched her eat as he finished his apple "Bunny? How is your chest?" he said. Alex flinched. "It's fine. I mean, not great, because I did my best to cough myself to death, but it's fine" "You don't have to tell me if you feel uncomfortable" "Why would I feel uncomfortable?" she asked. Alex was confused. Vane shrugged. "I was pretty self-conscious about the beatings at your age. Didn't like other to see that I could be beat like that. Made me look weak. You want to look strong so they don't kick your ass" Alex laughed "nah, you got me good, but believe me, not many can do that, we all take care of each other, Guthrie's men, you see?" Tom and the other wouldn't have let her get hurt.

Vane nodded taking another bite of the apple and staring at the distance. "Sometimes there are things a guy doesn't want to tell others, not especially those he works with" He said and pinned Alex down with his stare. " Sometimes admitting you are getting beat without being able to make it stop is hard" Alex was feeling weird. And she had no idea what he was talking about.

"What?" she croaked. Vane gave her more food. "If someone doing that to you?" he gestured towards her chest. Alex looked down to the bandages hidden under her clothes. Was he insinuating what she thought he was insinuating? She swallowed the mouthful of fruit she was chewing on. "Wait. Wait, wait, wait. Wait. Are you asking me if I'm being bullied?" She couldn't believe it. She may not be the biggest, strongest fighter around. Or the most skilled, or the bravest. But god damn it, she was able to hold her own on a fight. At least until one of the other men came to help, or her brothers could lend her a hand. And who in hell, or Nassau, in this case, was so crazy as to try and bully someone working for Eleanor Guthrie? Vane shrugged. "I don't know Bunny, Are you?" "No, no no no. Even if I was, that wouldn't last long. Eleanor Guthrie is my employer. She may not give a shit about me personally, but I'm one of her men. An aggression towards me is a sign of disrespect for her. And she doesn't take that kindly. She would rip the bully a new one. And my family may not be big, or scary or really skilled when it comes to fighting. But they would rip apart whoever dares to hurt me. We are tight"

"I noticed. Your brothers give me the stink eye every time we met, brave lads, don't like they little brother keeping bad company like myself. Stupid, but brave. Your mama must be proud" Alex winced. "She would be" Vane stopped on his way to take another apple from the table. "You don't know?" Alex shook her head "She died when I was six. I still remember her, You know? This gentle soothing voice, and the shinning wavy hair. She liked to sing" Vane looked at the bay, and Alex looked at her hands. There was a moment of silence. "I lost my mother as a kid too. I don't know if she's still alive. They took me from her arms, and beat her down when she scream at them to give me back to her" Alex couldn't help herself. "What happened to you?" Vane turned to look at her. Defiant. "They sold me" He said. And shove aside his shirt to show her the mark burnt into his flesh. "I escaped, joined a crew. Made a life for myself. I never looked back"

Alex shuddered. Her brothers talked to her about slavery to scare her when she was a child. What an awful thing. In Nassau, Slaves where common in the plantations of the inside of the island, the oh so called civilized part. But as you got closed to the one controlled by the Pirates, Slavery was something no one liked to flaunt around, since a big part of the crews were made from runaways and freed slaves, and they didn't look kindly to slave masters. She still remembered the dark tales they told her, of what happened to slaves, of how she should always be with her family so their horrible slave hunters won't catch her.

"That… That's awful" Alex said. She felt she had to say something, and it was the truth. Vane chuckled "Yeah, but you don't know about awful Aye? You live a good life, a nice life, with your family" He said. He sounded mocking and envious. Alex smiled. She couldn't deny it. Bitterly, she replied "Aye, if you don't count the part where my Ma was killed when I was six, while my brothers and I tried not to breathe to loud so we wouldn't get caught, but yeah" Alex didn't know why she had told Vane. She never talked about her mother's death. No one mentioned it. Ever. Her father couldn't even say her name out loud. Vane gave her a strange look, Alex blurted out "At least none of our mothers left us behind because they wanted to. Though, well, at least I wasn't a slave" Vane's eyes went wide as saucers and then laughed himself silly. "Bunny… Alex? You are weird" "I refuse to be called weird by someone like you" that only made him laugh harder.

"Was it hard? As a slave?" Vane shrugged "Couldn't tell. They made us work, they beat us up, they fed us enough. Can't compare to what a kid is supposed to do. And you? Was it hard, without mother?" It was Alex's turn to shrug "I was six… I just… Sometimes is sad. When one of us wakes up screaming. That of all the good things she gave us we will always remember first her death" Vane looked at her for a second, took a deep breath and look to the horizon. "They used to whip us. Night and day. Sometimes to work faster, sometimes for the hell of it. I was glad when I grew up. Kids get the worst jobs. Cleaning the chimneys or the letrine were the easy ones. Sometimes they made us bring water to the labourers and the guards. One may think is an easy task, but, the slaves know they can hurt you, and they are the only ones they can hurt. The guards beat you up if they think you are too slow. You have to run back and forth through the fields with all that water at your back, without a rest, or a sip" He felt silent, and Alex took it as a sign to talk.

" We would wake up screaming. Sam, Joe and I shared a bed until I was fifteen. To keep the nightmares away. Anyway, our house is not that big. The screaming wakes us all up. It's just… pirates came further inland. A raid. And there was this little place my parents put important stuff in… It could fit us three, but not my mom. She just closed the lid, put the table back in place over the hole, and… stood there. Sam told me to close my eyes, and covered my ears. But I could hear the screaming. And their laughter. It went on, and on, and on… until it stopped. We stayed down there until father came back from work and let us out. He had put her in their bed. He covered her up and wouldn't let us see her. She died a couple of days later. We moved closer to Nassau and father started working for the Guthries. For protection. And I… well. Life was messed up. Is messed up. But well, that's life".

Vane was looking at her with a thunderous expression. Alex was asking herself what did she do wrong when she felt the tears running down her cheeks. Vane moved forward and kneeled before her. "Hey there Bunny" he said softly. He cradled her face between his big callused hands. He was frowning. A worried expression in his face. He shushed her as he wiped the tears that flowed freely from her eyes. "Hey, hey shhhh, it's fine, it's fine, let it out" She sobbed "I'm not the only one who has had a shitty life" Vane grimaced "That doesn't mean your shitty life is less painful, or that you shouldn't cry" she tried to free herself from the tightness in her throat, but kept sobbing. She stared at Vane's eyes and lost herself on their blue depths. "We can't even say her name, father hasn't called her by her name in years" Vane looked at her face for a moment, and then, barely a whisper, he asked "What was your mother's name?" Alex could feel the full blown tearfest coming. She tried to stay calm. "Elisabeth". Vane closed his eyes, breathed in. The hands around her face moved, one around her neck and another around her back. He yanked and she fell into his chest. "It's a pretty name, bet she was a pretty woman" he muttered into her hair as they embraced.

Alex cried and cried for what it felt like hours, sobbing her sadness and babbling about her mother. All the things she couldn't ask her family. All the whys and whats and whos she never was able to voice. She would have liked to tell him right there and then about the decision her father had made for her, the decision she had kept on her own free will once she grew up. She was dying to tell someone. Anyone.

In the end she managed to somehow stop crying. At some point Charles grew tired of being on his knees and had maneuverer them into a better position. He was on the floor, legs spread, back against the couch he had been sitting on, and Alex was lying in the space between his legs, curled with her hands around his neck, sobbing in his shoulder. Even when she stopped crying, Charles kept holding her. She turned her head so her nose was touching the skin of his neck. And if she sniffed him a little, well, no one had to know.

"Do you cry about the shit in your life too?" she asked. About being a slave? About… about Eleanor? Vane tensed. He pet her hair. "Sometimes Bunny, even a pirate has to cry" Alex fised her eyes on what she could see of him. His hair and his ear, the line of his jaw. The stubble. " Why does this keep happening?" Charles laughed, and it shook them both. "I don't know Bunny, Who knows why does those bad things happen again and again? Life sucks." Alex turned her head and closed her eyes. "Not that. We keep meeting, we keep… talking" Charles shrugged and the movement shook her head from his shoulder. She moved, and he relaxed his embrace so she could look at him in the eye.

He moved his hand to put an errant strand of hair behind her ear "I don't know Bunny. You are a half-pint lad with not even a hair on your face that managed to put me to sleep. I was drunk, but you managed. I respect that. You care for your family and work hard. You are a good lad. Good things don't happen often to good lads. Especially not here. Hell not anywhere. I don't want you to get hurt" Alex felt herself blush.

"Anyway, I clearly remember you chasing after me like a baby duckling" Alex's eyes went big as saucers. "I… just… I didn't know you were nice! It was a surprise! For a pirate, you have a surprisingly gentlemanny moral code. And, well, for a single fearsome pirate I know that's actual pretty decent… I didn't want you to get hurt either" She forced herself not to look away from Charles. Mainly because she tended to look down and right below was his crotch. Not really a good place to stare at the moment. "I remember you, in the tent" Alex blushed bright red "Don't do that ever again Charles Vane, or I will personally beat you to death. You are strong. You only need to find a way to show it to everyone. That she didn't break you. That she may be the queen of this island, but you pirates are allies, not subjects to toy around with" She was getting more and more winded up with every word "You deserve better. She may have the rest of us by the balls. But you? You have a chance to be more than a pawn. Use it" she was close to panting, the bandages tight against her flesh with every breath. "And you should forget her. She's mean. Really mean. That's not a heart that she has in her chest. That's a rock. I bet she doesn't even float. She… she can't love. Love is not using people and stepping on their heads, and discarding them" Vane let out a sarcastic laugh. "you know much about love?" "No. Nothing. At least not about that kind of love. But I know about other kind of love. But all have something in common. You don't harm those you love. Not even those you no longer love" "Bunny…" Vane hugged her tightly and then they stared at each other.

They were having a beautiful moment staring into each other's eyes, when the tolling of a bell interrupted them. Alex flinched. That was Miss Eleanor's call for her men. All her men. She carefully rose. "I have to go, she's calling all her men in" Vane arched an eyebrow "And you are one of her men?" he said, emphasising the word men. He was lying there, looking up at her with surprise on his face. Alex shrugged "It's honest work, and she pays me handsomely for doing it" She turned to go, when Vane found is voice again "Be careful Bunny! Those men out there will not care that you are a half pint" She nodded and left, hearing him getting up. Alex exited the whorehouse with big strides towards the Bar.

The entrance was packed. Every Guthrie man was trying to navigate the sea of bodies, to reach their posts, while the pirates hollered for Eleanor Guthrie's blood. Alex tried to sneak in, as Captain Lillywhite screamed nonsense to all who would listen. She finally got in and Tom directed her towards the balcony, where other two were ready with guns in their hands. She grimaced. "I'm not a good shot" she told Tom "Alex, lad, if they get inside, it will be five to one, and you are not that good with a blade" she growled. She could shot, but she was way better with a sword in her hand. Tom was right, she wasn't skilled enough that she would fare better five to one with a sword. She sighed. Alex took a gun and got ready to shoot if needed. She knew who she was going to shoot first. Lillywhite.

A move in front of her. She looked up and saw Charles Vane looking from the brothel, cigarette in hand, casually resting his arms on the rails. Oh god, he looked so handsome. No. no. Bad brain. Bad heart. Important stuff was going on. Vane crossed looks with her, and he inclined his head at her, and winked. Alex smiled. If what he had said earlier was true, Vane had her back. Not that he could do much against a mob, but it made her feel better, knowing that he at least would try.

They heard a small commotion down stairs and Eleanor Guthrie came into the street to announce screaming that the crew of the Ranger was free of her ban and that Captain Vane was allowed to hunt again. Alex smiled was brighter than the sun, and she searched for Vane. But he was nowhere in sight.

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	5. Revelations and canons

Alex was incredibly pissed. Vane had disappeared in a skiff off to God knows where, not telling a soul what he was planning to do. And the bastard had taken Alex's handkerchief with him. If Alex had known he was planning to disappear, he would have stopped him, but she did not, and now, once again, she had lost a piece of clothing to Charles Vane. It wasn't even funny anymore.

Alex had been working at the docks when she saw Vane with the skiff, loading stuff. She took her break to go over there and help him load. He had given her a strange look when she beat him to the barrel of water he was about to lift. "Bunny, you are going to break" he joked "you shouldn't pull so much weight, it won't let you grow tall" she huffed. She looked around, but for a small satchel, a package and the crate, there was nothing else.

"Going somewhere?" she asked. Vane just smiled, and reclined into the skiff. "Shouldn't you be at work?" "I'm in my break" she shot back. Vane was covered in sweat, droplets here and there that travelled from his brow down to his neck and over his pectorals. Alex swallowed and tore her eyes away from the enticing tanned flesh. She dug into her pockets and took the handkerchief she had made while she was still recovering from her illness, and put it in Vane's hand. "Here, you are all covered in sweat".

Her patron shouted at her to go back to work, and Alex cursed and ran off "Make sure to give it back uh? It took me a while to get it right!" she had said. And, to date, it was the last time she saw her handkerchief.

Vane had disappeared that day. It had been three whole days and she still didn't know what happened to him. Or where he was. Or if he was to give back her handkerchief. She had kept dreaming about all the horrible thing that could have happened to him. The trouble he might have encountered.

But life in Nassau was anything but boring. She was called to Miss Eleanor Guthrie's office, along with Tom. In a corner, dark and dangerous as a rattlesnake, was Anne Bonnie, face hidden by her hat. Alex could feel those blue eyes observing them. Judging. Measuring. Alex walked into the room feeling her limbs heavy and awkward as if they were wood instead of flesh.

Alex sneaked glances at Anne Bonnie during the whole meeting. What a woman. She was the fiercest person Alex had ever met. Any pirate on the island would rather eat his own boots than pick up a fight with Anne Bonny. She was the main reason no one had gutted Jack Rackham… yet. They would go to the wrecks, and eliminate some filth that had angered Miss Eleanor. Eliminate. Alex had never killed a man. She had beaten them and held them down, tossed them into the streets. But this was far different. Tom guided her and other three souls into the wrecks, and Alex tried to compose the wreck that was she. Her breathing was erratic and she could barely held back the scream when Tom touched her shoulder. "Hey kid, don't be nervous, I have seen you fight, hell, I have taught you to fight, you'll be fine" Alex whispered "Tom, I don't know if I can do this, I have never killed before, I'm not sure if I have the guts for it" she was shivering. Tom turned her around to examine her better under the moonlight. She was shivering, her eyes watering, and she looked completely terrified.

Tom looked at her and sighed. "Kid, you cannot run from this, not forever" Alex nodded "One day you will have to kill" She sniffed. "Now, there is no need for you to start now. You are a good fighter. Knock them out, fend them off, don't let them get away, and leave the rest to us" Alex nodded again, trying her best not to cry tears of relief.

"Tom? Are you going to tell miss Eleanor?" Eleanor wanted competent people. And by competent she meant people that would do her biding without questions or doubts. Tom laughed "What? That you are a decent fellow who actually gives a shit about not murdering people? Listen Alex, you are young, you'll understand one day that here in Nassau blood is something you cannot shy away of" Alex nodded again, and clapped Tom in the back. She squeezed his arm and went to her position. She tried to past her time, tried not to think on what was going to happen.

In the end, no amount of prayers, or wild plans to leave the island or shag Charles Vane and Billy Bones at the same time prevented Alexandra from having to fight.

Anne came followed by Jack Rackham and the rest of the crew of the Ranger, well, those who had remained loyal to Vane. A torch signalled their position. Alex's heart clenched. Tom and one of the veterans, and scary looking fellow named Jim that was actually pretty sweet to those he liked. He had taught Alex how to hold her own in a fist fight, and gave her pieces of sweet fruits as treats for every time he got beat during her lessons.

Anne Bonny soon disappeared in the shadows, and the men divided to look for her, walking right into the ambush. Al, another of the workers for Miss Eleanor, left his post and started his descent towards the pirates, and Alex quickly followed. She followed Tom's advice, and herded back into the fray the men that tried to escape. Everything was happening like in a dream, like she wasn't even present. The screams, the blood, the foul smell. One man tried to get pass her, but Alex rose her cutlass and forced the man back into the waiting arms of Tom, who finished him off. Another tried to make a break for it, and Alex dodged a punch and reached for a rock. She threw it hard and fast and it got the man in the head. He fell like a ragdoll, and Old Al finished the job. By the time it was over, Alex was sweaty and covered in dust and some blood. None of it was hers, thank god. She looked at the men lying in the dirt in pools of their own blood and shivered. She thought of her mother. Alex wanted nothing more than to get home and bath herself in hot water, until the little droplets of blood in her hands disappeared.

Tom and the others threw the bodies into the sea, and all together went back to the tavern. There, they were loud and chatted non-stop, but Alex couldn't bring herself to smile, even less to talk. They gave her drink after drink, and she downed them, trying to somehow quench the guilt she felt. She hadn't killed those men directly, but she helped. On the other hand, they were rapists and filth of the worst kind and they didn't deserve to live. Hours came and went, and after a couple of mishaps on the way (aka she drank her weight in liquor and puked half of it in the back of the tavern come morning) she was hangovered, and hungry, and sad.

Her still half drunk brain wanted Charles to be on the island, so she could whine in his arms and he could hold her tight. The sober half knew she should just stop talking to the man altogether before it got her in serious trouble.

She was examining a pile of mangos sighing like a lovesick puppy ( that she was, but she wasn't ready to admit it, and preferred not to think about it), when her brother Joe touched her shoulder and made her jump three feet in the air.

"Hey there. Alexander, my dear little brother, May I introduce you Miss Mary Jeune?" Alex found herself staring. The woman beside her brother was petite, with elegant white hands grasping a white parasol. She was dressed in a simple, but well-made pale yellow dress, a colour that brought out her shinning copper locks, a great contrast to Joe's raven hair, that had been neatly combed in a ponytail. Her heart shaped face was perfect, and her soft pink lips were smiling at her. Miss Jeune's eyes were a deep green, again a perfect contrast to the pale green of Joe's eyes. Both young, and beautiful, smiling, radiant like twin suns. Alex couldn't help the smile that bloomed in her face, nearly splitting it in two. Alex took of her hair and bowed with a flourish. "Miss Jeune, my pleasure, I am sure" she said, and took her hand to kiss it.

Mary giggled "What a charming brother you have, Joseph. He must be quite the heartbreaker" Joe laughed at that, and he clapped Alex hard in the back "Aye, aye, My little brother is after a rare beauty" he said, and smirked. Alex felt her blood run cold "Dark hair, tanned skin, bewitching blue eyes… He has even gone to court her in the middle of the night" she could feel herself blush a bright red. She knew that her brother was teasing her, but she couldn0t help getting mad. Was it that noticeable? And even if it was, how did Sam know about the visit she paid Vane at night?

The teasing continued until Joe made their excuses and led sweet Mary away. When they were leaving, though, Joe leaned in and whispered in her ear. "You talk in your sleep" Alex blushed and exclaimed "No I don't!" Alex paused, taking in what he said. "When did you watch me sleep? Creep!" Joe turned around and locked his arm around her neck like an iron chain. Her hair was soon a wild thing sticking out in all directions.

Her brother went on his merry way, and she was left again to her thoughts. She decided to take a walk to the docks, to see her father. She bought an apple for him, and watched happily how he devoured it. "Alex, darling, some water" he said between bites, and Alex was quick to fetch him the pitcher of cool water. "How is your friend? Have you seen her again?" Alex was surprised, and it took her some time to catch on. Her father was munching on the fruit, looking at her. She stuttered and managed to get out a sentence that made some sense. "Oh, yeah. I talked to her alright. She was in a bad place, but I think she will be better now" Her father nodded. "Good. Good girls should stay away from pirates and other filth, they would ruin them given the chance, and their families. God bless you child, for been such a nice girl. Your mother would be proud. One day, we'll be out of Nassau, and you and your brothers will have a better future. All of us"

Alex smiled at her father, trying her best not to show how guilty she felt. Anyway she didn't have anything to feel guilty about. Wasn't that a shame? She didn't really feel like being with Charles, was shameful. The encounters had been as innocent as they could be.

"Do you remember about him? About what happened to us?" Said her father, and suddenly his tone was cold and full of hate. She knew who he was referring to. Her eldest brother. Now he must be around thirty something, going on forty. "Yes father, I remember" she said, and tried to swallow the lump in her throat. Oh boy, what a day for her dad to have an Asshole day. "If it wasn't for him and that trullup he fancied we would still be living in comfort in London. Your mother would have never died the way she died, and your life would never have been like this. You would live in comfort and luxury, with lovely dresses and jewels" He was practically frothing at the mouth. Alex's heart clenched. She loved her father to bits. He had always being gentle and caring. Always tried his best to give them the best, and even insisted on them having a proper education. It was thanks to him that all three siblings could read and write, discuss science or politics, read books in greek or latin, and father had insisted that they received music lessons, each in a different instrument.

It had been hard work.

Alex couldn't be more grateful.

Alex right now had enough with her own problems about Vane and her stupid obsession with the man.

Alex cut her father's rant short and turned tail. She was too conflicted. Her father had always been like that.

To understand him, and most of the dynamic of Alex's family, one would have to go to a time when Alex was practically a baby. Her father, with his two brothers, were the owners of a flourishing merchant empire ( or so Alex's father said). His father had a beautiful and kind wife, Elizabeth, and a Son, Nathaniel, his eldest, and his proud and joy. Ten years younger than his older brother, came Joseph, a child of seven, Samuel, two years younger than his brother was little Joseph, and the only girl, the princess of the house, little Alexandra, who was two years old at the time.

But, the eldest son fell in with bad companies. One was a beautiful enticing girl, named Alfonsina, a girl with Spanish roots that claimed to be the daughter of a rich plantation owner far away in the Spanish colonies. The truth was far from it. Alfonsina was a trickster than seduced Nathaniel into marrying her. Nathaniel bankrupted after a "series of bad investments in Alfonsina's family business", and went to beg his father for help.

A few months later, came the horrible truth. Nathaniel had gambled away his health, his wealth, and finally, his family's property, leaving them in poverty. When they came to collect their debts, fearing what would become of them, and not being able to pay, Alex's family fled to the West, hoping to find a better life, and only finding death and strife instead. Their ship was a cheap one, and they soon found out why. Its destiny was the den of depravity that was Nassau. Having expended all their money in their passages to leave England, their little family found itself stranded in Nassau. As for her uncles, father wrote to them, but the answer he received was a shot through his heart. They had committed suicide to escape humiliation.

Alex busied herself with her daily chores back home to take her mind away. And That's how Sam found her, furiously beating bloodstains out of her sheets in their backyard. "Wow, what did they do to you to deserve that?" Alex glared at her brother. Sam looked at her and smiled. It was a sad smile. "Did something happen?" Alex growled. Her brother smiled and sat by her side, while she attacked the offending cloth. "Was it Joe?" she sighed. "Your pirate Captain?" Alex blushed "he's not my anything. And how do you even know about u…about him?" Joe smiled at her. "Because believe it or not neither of you are very subtle. He watches you like a hawk, and since you had that fight your head is up in the clouds. The only one who doesn't notice is father. And just because he had always believed you are the angel of the family"

Alex mock gasped "Am I not?" Sam laughed "Oh you are an angel alright, but maybe a fallen one. I have never heard of angels getting up to so much mischief as you do" Alex smiled. True that she had been a handful as a child, but hey, a little girl with no friend had the right to at least prank her big brothers… right?.

"Well, then, and since you have no friends because you are too scared they will discover you have no cock, I'm going to assume it was father". Alex stopped beating up the sheet she was washing. The stain was long gone, a bit of a mark was left, but it was the best she could do. Dried blood was an awful thing to get rid of. She tried to squeeze as much water as she could before hanging the sheet. "You know how he gets sometimes Sammy, about pirates. Sometimes I think he doesn't realize there is no respectable people in Nassau at all" Sam took the sheet from her hands and went to hang it. "Lex, you realize he lost a lot of things because pirates and crooks, right? You were too young to remember…" Alex snapped at him "So what? Is he never going to let it go? All our lives, he has controlled who we talked to, what we do. He even chased away that girl you were trying to court a few years ago because she wasn't good enough, respectable enough for him!"

"Marika and I came from different backgrounds, we wouldn't have been good for each other. And you know this place is full of people that would ruin us, we have to be careful if we want to escape… Remember Mo…" "Don't drag her into this Sammy, just don't, sometimes it angers me that he uses her that way"

Sam looked at her, mouth open, eyes big, completely shocked. "What? What do you mean?" Alex paced "He always, always, brings up mom's death. Don't do this, don't do that, don't talk to those kids, to that woman to that man, all in the name of mom's corpse" "Now see here!" "No!" she screamed "Can't you see? Sometimes is like father has two faces. I love him, he is my dad, but you know, You know that what I'm telling you is true. We are under his thumb. What will happen when we get out Sammy? What will become of us? I want to be able to walk freely through the street, safe without the bandages, or wear a pretty dress, a necklace, a bun, for god sakes! But I'm afraid of what would come next, if I would exchange a cage for another."

Her brother was speechless "The pirate is giving you weird ideas Lexie, dangerous ones too" he said. "You know why Da wants you to hide, if they knew you're a lass, you would end raped on an alley with your throat slit from side to side". He sighed, and tried to approach her. Alex turned her head away, eyes full of tears. She was scared to death of that, having had a first row seat through her mother's horrible death. She shivered. And then, a flash.

Anne Bonny.

Eleanor Guthrie.

They were women.

And they weren't afraid.

They were free to be themselves.

To dress like a man and carry a sword. To have their own business. Not bandaging their chest or hiding their sex. True that their life was dangerous but, living in Nassau, that was the norm. "It doesn't has to be that way. I have seen it done, women live in Nassau…" "But They are not safe!" her brother protested. Alex felt the rage bubbling inside of her like an ugly twisted thing. She eyed the open door of the house, debating between retreating into the house or keeping arguing with her brother, knowing that it would come to bite her in the ass once Joe and their dad got home. They would gang up on her like a pack of rabid wolves.

She chose retreat. "Bollocks Sam" she howled "No one is safe in Nassau!" and then she close the door with a bang and went all the way to her room. Once her brother left the back of the house, she climbed out of the window and stomped in the Port's direction. She was going to have a drink, maybe even talk to Anne Bonny. All the males in her family were welcome to suck on her inexistent prick.

She had barely advanced a hundred paces when she heard a booming noise. Alex knew it was a canon being fired but her mind right now was pure chaos. She threw herself down and screamed. She scrambled to get up, and on four legs she crawled, trying to get away from the noise. Another canon was fired and she screamed again. Joe and her father were away at Nassau. What if it was a raid? She managed to get on her feet but was trembling from head to toe. Suddenly her vision clouded. She wasn't outside under the Caribbean sun, she was inside a tiny hole in the ground, screams all around, her brother's hand on her mouth , trying not to make a sound.

Alex threw up. She had to find her family. She had to. Where? Where to go? Another canon. Her legs could barely hold her. She heard someone calling her name. Sam. It was Sam, he had went out of the house and was calling to her. She ran towards him, tripping with every canon fired, picking herself up, not caring about the broken trousers or the scrapped knees and bloody palms.

"Alex! Alex where are you?! ALEX" She hug him tigh "I'm here, I'm here, Sam, Sammy we have to hide, we have to… They will be here soon, the fort can't hold forever come on come on" She dragged her brother inside. Sam was very pale, trembling, and muttering "no, no, no, no" again and again and again. Alex's heart was about to burst. She looked around but didn't find a place to hide. Where to? Where to? They had to go, they had to hide. They could go, not without Joe and their Dad. Her eyes settled in the table. A big monstrosity sitting on top of the family vault. Empty since a long time ago. Alex carried Sam to the kitchen, and then went to push the table away, and pry open the secret door. The space was dusty and narrower than she remembered. It would have to do.

"Sam? Sam we have to hide, Let's go" she pushed her brother forward, and when he saw the table and the open door, he seemed to snap out of his trance and quickly crawled inside. Alex lingered in the kitchen, taking a pitcher full of water and some food with her. She saw the space left. It wasn't much. Alex hadn't moved the table completely out of the way, realising too late it would give them away. Sam was staring at the wall in front of him, and didn't even blink. Alex squished herself inside, and put the pitcher and the food away, lying on top on Sam, before closing the door. There, in the dark, the only thing to do was wait.

There was a moment when the only thing Alex could do was trying not to wet herself. Hearing the canons there in the tiny hole, in the dark, she was shivering badly. She tried to think of better things, of brighter things. Gods if she survived this she was going to ride Charles Vane to hell and back. And wear a pretty dress. Pink. No, green. Or Blue. Blue, it would match perfectly Charles's eyes. They would run away from Nassau. Marry. Perhaps have a small business? They could sell things. Charles could easily become a soldier, and climb the ranks. Or a merchant captain. They would have tons of children. Alex chuckled bitterly. Yeah, right. Like any of that would happen. Maybe with Bill Bones? My, the kids would be astonishingly handsome. And he would be kind, and he was such a lovely thing of a boy. Maybe she should kiss Billy if she survived this. Many hours passed. They knew because light gave way to night, and the slivers of light that passed through the gaps in the woods disappeared. On one occasion looters came in, but found nothing. They complained about the lack of a wench to fuck or any valuables to plunder, and left. Alex cried silently in her hiding spot, with one hand over her mouth and snot and tears running down her face.

The door burst open with a bang, and Alex nearly wet herself then and there. Steps. And then, a voice. "Alex? Sam? Kids are you in here?" They waited. It was the voice of their father. "Dad, maybe they went further inland? Maybe they are not here" said another voice. Joe. They were safe. Alex opened the trap door and crawled out, making strangled noises. She hugged her father tightly. "Dad, Dad I was so scared!" "Oh my baby, My baby girl! I wouldn't know what to do if something happened to you!" her father kissed her head, and hugged her tightly. Joe hugged her too. "Where is Sam?" Alex pointed at the trapdoor, where Sam was trying to crawl out.

Once the family had reunited they had a light snack and decided to sleep all together in a pile, hugging each other tightly. When Joe and their father were recounting their day at the port, Alex learned something that left her awake for the rest of the night, listening to the heartbeat and breathing of her little family. Charles Vane was back on Nassau, and was the one who took over the fort.


End file.
